What
is 'nice'? I mean, okay, being nice is important, it's an important
trait to have, but when someone is described primarily as 'nice' –
as in when that's the first word used to describe them – what does
that mean?
I think it could mean one of two things: it could mean that the person doing the describing doesn't know their subject that well – like when people say, “they seem nice”... “I like her, we didn't really talk, but she seems nice.” That's not really anything much. So if you've spoken to someone a few times, and they still just “seem nice”, then it probably means that you don't have much of a connection to them. They don't interest you and you don't interest them – or at least the former, but more than likely both.
That's why I don't understand why someone would want to be 'nice', or to be thought of as nice. I don't know how I want to be thought of... maybe as someone who brought happiness to everyone that met him, or someone whose thoughts and words were interesting and thought provoking, someone who was funny. Not “a nice person” though, not just that. I couldn't think of anything worse. And yet some people do want to be thought of as nice, and they still fuck EVEN THAT up. Because sometimes behind niceness hides passive-aggression. Sometimes someone who is trying to be 'nice', and declaring that as their goal, is really just too scared to identify what their actual aims are. Maybe they are ashamed of their true desires, or ashamed that they have selfish desires at all. Notice that I said that I want to be 'thought of as someone who...' etc. etc., because it's still about me. Of course. At least a little.
I really don't trust people who are unable to admit that they have selfish desires that may motivate a proportion of their actions. I'm sure of it, even in my language here, using the word 'admit', I really do believe that everyone who wants to continue to participate in life is doing so for some measure of selfish reason. Because they want to get something out of it. And that's okay, that's what we are supposed to want, I think; to add something, and to get something back in return. So when someone says to me, “I'm just trying to be nice”, I think,
“I know that's what you're trying to do, and as much as I'm sure you think you're achieving it, you're not. You're just afraid, afraid to admit that you want something, afraid to admit that you want life to be fair, and you want to get a return for the effort that you wish everyone saw you were putting in. But you're not, and you don't like it, you don't want to tell anyone, you want them to notice on their own, but why won't they? Why won't they notice you?”
Because they are thinking about themselves too, and if you don't make what you want known to people, then you're not going to get it by accident, fuckhead. The world does not provide for everyone.
I think that's what I need to say... this blog post seems very cunty, it's okay, I'm just trying to figure out an argumentative position for a bit. I don't really hate nice people. Well, maybe a little bit. Because it's funny to hate things for no reason, and because even if I wanted to, I doubt I could ever be one of them.
Peace, Taco.
I think it could mean one of two things: it could mean that the person doing the describing doesn't know their subject that well – like when people say, “they seem nice”... “I like her, we didn't really talk, but she seems nice.” That's not really anything much. So if you've spoken to someone a few times, and they still just “seem nice”, then it probably means that you don't have much of a connection to them. They don't interest you and you don't interest them – or at least the former, but more than likely both.
That's why I don't understand why someone would want to be 'nice', or to be thought of as nice. I don't know how I want to be thought of... maybe as someone who brought happiness to everyone that met him, or someone whose thoughts and words were interesting and thought provoking, someone who was funny. Not “a nice person” though, not just that. I couldn't think of anything worse. And yet some people do want to be thought of as nice, and they still fuck EVEN THAT up. Because sometimes behind niceness hides passive-aggression. Sometimes someone who is trying to be 'nice', and declaring that as their goal, is really just too scared to identify what their actual aims are. Maybe they are ashamed of their true desires, or ashamed that they have selfish desires at all. Notice that I said that I want to be 'thought of as someone who...' etc. etc., because it's still about me. Of course. At least a little.
I really don't trust people who are unable to admit that they have selfish desires that may motivate a proportion of their actions. I'm sure of it, even in my language here, using the word 'admit', I really do believe that everyone who wants to continue to participate in life is doing so for some measure of selfish reason. Because they want to get something out of it. And that's okay, that's what we are supposed to want, I think; to add something, and to get something back in return. So when someone says to me, “I'm just trying to be nice”, I think,
“I know that's what you're trying to do, and as much as I'm sure you think you're achieving it, you're not. You're just afraid, afraid to admit that you want something, afraid to admit that you want life to be fair, and you want to get a return for the effort that you wish everyone saw you were putting in. But you're not, and you don't like it, you don't want to tell anyone, you want them to notice on their own, but why won't they? Why won't they notice you?”
Because they are thinking about themselves too, and if you don't make what you want known to people, then you're not going to get it by accident, fuckhead. The world does not provide for everyone.
I think that's what I need to say... this blog post seems very cunty, it's okay, I'm just trying to figure out an argumentative position for a bit. I don't really hate nice people. Well, maybe a little bit. Because it's funny to hate things for no reason, and because even if I wanted to, I doubt I could ever be one of them.
Peace, Taco.
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